I'm coming back to rewrite this question I asked years ago. My wording then was apparently too caustic to allow the question to last long enough for many on PSE to consider its meaning. I realize now that presentation can be everything for some people and some forums, so I am coming back to make another attempt at asking the same question with same meaning albeit with a different demeanor.
I'm taking on an interesting task: explaining to an advanced high school student that much of what he hears and reads from popular physics videos and TV isn't accurate. I need to decide if I go so far as to explain that while there is evidence that an electron (for instance) behaves in a wave-like manner there is no evidence showing that an electron actually is a wave. There is, rather, much evidence showing that when an electron interacts with something else that the system involved in the interaction appears to be wave-like. It is quite the ontological leap, in my opinion, for one to use this as evidence that therefore the electron is a wave.
I realize that many physics PhDs will disagree. This is why I'm posing the question. Some disagree. Many others do not. Physicists on both sides are equally as bright and equally as versed on theory and experimental observation.
Regarding what I tell this student, I can explain what a probability function is, and that it's a solution to a wave equation. I can explain that this probability function is not the electron itself, but rather a mathematical function utilized to describe and predict behavior of electrons and their interactions. But how best to, at a not-so-advanced level, explain the difference between "is a wave" and "behaves in a wave-like manner"?
At that age my understanding of QM would have advanced by 2 years or more if someone explained this. I'd like to know what others think, but if you're someone who is so sure that an electron is actually a wave please bring strong evidence to support your claim. To state something like "I know it's a wave because I see it diffract every day!" is disingenuous in my opinion. It's just another way of stopping the discussion, because you don't want to consider contrary arguments.
More details to explain my position:
The probability function (or superposition thereof) has meaning because it is directly related to the solution to a special wave equation that has proven to glean deep meaning. When considering wave equations related to an electron influenced by a potential, it is my opinion that the electron is not the solution to this wave equation. We can learn things about electron behavior from the solutions to this wave equation, but I think it makes little sense to believe that the electron is the solution to this same wave equation.
When we measure it we observe an energy and momentum exchange event. We do not measure "a wave". This is why many excellent theorists and experimentalists call it wave-like. I.E. because of its behavior.
If you believe that an electron is actually a wave what it your evidence?