my kitten is 6 months old, and last month i abused him in periodic crises, which occurred approximately 5 times a week, for two weeks.
this is what i did to him: (open spoiler to see)
i would pick him up and squeeze him in the thoracic region, where he would meow in a muffled/agonized way. and when he would run away or show any reaction of fear, i would hit him with my hand, slipper, and in extreme cases i threw him around the house twice. When he tried to get under the bed, I would pull him by the tail and hold him by the tail and squeeze him again.
I'm already in psychological treatment, and after a week or so I gradually regained his trust. he was always afraid, ran away whenever he saw me, hid, and withered or ran away when I tried to pick him up. he no longer came to sleep with me, or woke me up by licking my face and purring.
he gradually recovered these behaviors, not in the way i would have liked, until i had to castrate him. in the first few days, i had to medicate him, and he was very resistant, and i lost some of my trust again. now he's wearing an Elizabethan collar and I'm giving him the medication in the middle of his pâté. he's started meowing at me again, but he still won't lie down with me or wake me up by purring and licking me, and whenever I pick him up to pet him he wants to leave as soon as possible.
what can I do to regain my kitten's trust? i love him very much and i regret everything.
