Long story short, I got help, am on meds now, and doing better. I had screaming matches with my neighbors and even yelled at myself as dumb as it sounds and a few times at my cat [2 years old].
He now doesn't trust me as much. He used to fall asleep on my lap, now he's starting to pull fur out, given there is a new kitten around [I figured he could use a friend for when I start working again].
I'd really like to rebuild our friendship because I'm not that person anymore, I'd really appreciate any help on this. I love this cat with all my heart and hate myself for what I did, so please help me figure out how to rebuild what we had. Any help is welcome.
